on the rails

my hands look dead today

tinted blue, stained black

feel dead today

the medication, making my hands stick

or is that just the nervous sweat

and my heart overbeating (overbearing)

or is it wearing three layers indoors

my ribcage could give way,

could cave in.

the thrumming inside of it,

acceleration to a collapse.  

we've made up (out)

of this mess before,

and we'll do it again.